Denis Waitley says: "Conceit is God's gift to shallow people." I certainly don't think it's God's gift, but I do believe it's a crutch for people with low self-esteem. It's frightening how many managers in the workforce are attempting to lead a team when they themselves are lost in the woods.
Being in the sales training business I speak to generally two types of sales managers; the arrogant egotist and the humble achiever. I am amazed that the leaders who posses a great deal of humility, believe that there's nothing special about their style of leadership. I'll be on the phone with one of these managers and they'll open up...
They'll say something along the lines of: "My team is full of veterans who've been in the business for over 20 years and the lowest producing agent is taking home $90K... I think if they could get better in their line of questioning, they could do more. I believe there's always room for improvement and if they can pick up one or two ideas that'll take them to the next level, I'm all for it!"
I'll usually commend them for being open-minded to training. They almost seem surprised as if to say: "Who wouldn't be open to a fresh perspective?" They couldn't imagine that other managers don't believe in exposing their people to more ideas. It's illogical to them.
Now before we go further, let's not confuse a jaded manager with the closed-minded egotist. Occasionally, we'll encounter leaders who had a negative experience at a seminar or had the misfortune of sitting through a painful presentation from a hokey guest speaker. Every industry has its bad apples.
The professional development field certainly is not immune to mediocrity. Regardless, as far as the steam-rolling managers are concerned, mediocre or not, they could care less if it's Ronald Reagan or Gomer Pyle, they are not letting any outsiders into their sales meetings.
It's interesting, roughly 70% of managers who declined our training (on the basis of already knowing everything about selling) are no longer the sales managers when we come back to town and make our contacts. They were either fired or jumped to the next job, destined to destroy another team's morale. Roughly 80% of all the sales managers we worked with in the past are still there or they were promoted and oversee multiple locations.
How'd they get there? They are passionate about what they do and realize that an inflated ego is unhealthy and counterproductive.
Having a genuine conversation with a manager who is open to share his/her challenges is refreshing. When they openly point out their areas for improvement, they reveal a noble strength. Their awareness reminds me of the old PSA (Public Service Announcement) from the GI Joe cartoon.
- "Knowing is half the battle."
Being consciously incompetent (knowing that we don't know) is necessary in the journey towards wisdom.
When managers check their egos at the door and acknowledge that they don't know, the quicker they are able to escape the downward spiral of denial and foolishness. From there, they begin to look at life in a whole new light. Their Napoleon complex gradually decreases, others enjoy being around them, and they feel excited about all the new information they're able to absorb.
By having an opened mind, the grounded sales manager seems warm, friendly, calm and confident. Although, I'm amazed that the majority of people in management just don't get it! You know who I mean, the people who recklessly deify themselves. They tell you how suave they are. "I don't do seminars. I'm the trainer. I've been selling for years!"
What they fail to share is they probably couldn't pour coffee out of a pot if the directions were on the bottom. Their existence is like the wizard behind the curtain. They puff themselves up and beat others down in an effort to appear powerful and superior. I find it troubling that these managers who seem to possess the qualities of self indulgent dictators actually achieve a certain degree of (financial) success. I have to remind myself that success is subjective, and the Napoleonites are most likely empty inside.
It's frustrating to see that the annoying, incompetent egotists can actually be promoted to leadership roles. I think of them as big babies and the companies they work for as giant pacifiers.
These managers are nothing more than examples of what not to become. Their facades can be a snare for those (especially young people) in the midst of their quarter life crisis. "I guess in order for me to become a manager, I have to brown-nose my way to the top. Then once I get there I'll brow beat everyone into submission." And the saga continues...
Fortunately those with emotional intelligence can see through the posturing and are able to overcome their superficial tendencies. The leaders who lack emotional intelligence are doomed to be the topics of water cooler snickering. They're the joke after the first beer at happy hour. Everyone cringes at the sight of them.
But don't hard-nosed, arrogant people rake in big bucks? Often times, yes. If so, is there anyone significant around to share it with? Is it worth it? You decide.
When giving sales presentations to these managers I used to believe that it wasn't worth my breath. What I've learned is that the subordinates behind the big babies need my help! There are good people out there who need and desire the tools to escape mediocre management.
Unfortunately for these folks, when the egotists feel threatened, they lash out in a fit of fear. They cling to a persona, a facade that projects this mighty and powerful being. Hmmm... -Did I say mighty and powerful? This is what they think their projecting. The only people the egotists are fooling are the other self righteous, lost souls who are too busy with their own fictional existence to take notice.
Ironically, those who thirst to measure up in a world motivated by dominance and status will never be quenched.
The people they're trying to impress don't care about them. All they're thinking is how to one-up the other guy. Sadly, these people never become fulfilled. They rob themselves from experiencing the freedom of being "real". They're grasping for a life that doesn't exist.
What is your motive?
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